


Reasons We Need Lips so Much

by thephantomrunner



Series: Your Roots in My Dreamland [1]
Category: Julie and The Phantoms (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-22
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-11 00:42:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,657
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28236387
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thephantomrunner/pseuds/thephantomrunner
Summary: So maybe in that moment, Julie Molina realized that she liked kissing girls. She liked kissing girls. And wanted to keep kissing girls. That was fine. More than fine, actually.It was the fact that she liked kissing Flynn- the fact that she wanted to keep kissing Flynn, that freaked her the hell out.Or: Five times that Flynn kissed Julie and one time Julie kissed Flynn.
Relationships: Flynn & Julie Molina, Flynn/Julie Molina
Series: Your Roots in My Dreamland [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2068473
Comments: 28
Kudos: 52





	1. In Years to Come We’ll reminisce

**Author's Note:**

> Oh, hello Dear Reader. I hope this story finds you well <3 
> 
> Am I writing a JATP fanfic based on lyrics from the fabulous Disney movie, Enchanted? Why, yes, yes I am.
> 
> Anyway, this is my first time writing for JATP, so I’m still trying to get my footing with the characterizations. I was craving some Flynn/Julie content; I hope I did them justice!! 
> 
> Hope you enjoy! <3

Her skates had been ice blue. Sparkly, icy blue, with bubblegum pink laces and lavender wheels- the pale colors contrasted with the bright red of her leggings; everything about them screamed Flynn. Julie watched as Flynn’s long fingers swiftly tied the thin pink laces. She stood up with a triumphant grin on her face, eyes training expectantly on Julie, whose focus still rested on the perfect little bows Flynn had just finished tying. 

“Julie!” Flynn snapped her fingers playfully, shoving Julie's own skates towards her feet. “Come on!” Her voice dragged out all the vowel sounds, begging. Julie rolled her eyes, a smile gracing her lips.

“Fine!” Flynn giggled in response as Julie grabbed a skate, sliding her left foot into it. Flynn had gotten them for her 11th birthday a few months earlier; they were violet with neon butterflies of every color littering the leather. Her laces were hot pink, opposing Flynn’s light pink ones. 

Flynn had gotten a pair for Christmas last year, and since then, she really hadn’t taken them off. Julie remembered how she had wobbled uncontrollably and how her scraped hands and knees had forced her to invest in a pair of skating gloves and knee pads. Despite this, Flynn was determined to master the art of roller skating, making it her goal to skate to school for the rest of fifth grade. Julie could only laugh and roll her eyes fondly as Flynn would skid circles around her on their morning treks to school. 

“Flynn!” She had called “Slow down!” 

“Neveerrrrr!” Flynn had called back, easily a hyperbolic mile ahead of Julie. “You’ll just have to get a pair so you can keep up!” Her distant giggles had been enough to make Julie break into a jog to catch up.

When Julie opened the gift on her birthday, Flynn’s bright, enthusiastic smile had been enough to manipulate her into agreeing to let the other girl teach her how to use them. Julie knew that Flynn had saved more than a couple of months of allowance in order to buy them for her. The skates were cute, and they screamed _Julie Molina_. She loved them, but Flynn’s countless Hello Kitty and rainbow bandages had been enough to terrify her out of using them. Up until this moment, they had sat prettily at the front of her closet, right next to her purple Converse. Flynn had tried several times to coax them out of the spot in Julie's closet where they resided, however Julie always came up with a convenient excuse when Flynn asked her to go skating: excuses like homework, and that she twisted her wrist trying to grab a pencil in fourth period social studies. She couldn’t possibly skate with a twisted wrist. 

“Julie!” Flynn's voice snapped out of her thoughts “It’s gonna get dark before we have any time to go anywhere. My dad wants me home before seven” Julie looked up at Flynn, stubbornly sliding in the other skate, a small smile playing on her lips. She quickly tied the laces, her heart rate beginning to pick up as she bent her knee, feeling one of her legs slide forward with the wheels, almost against her will. 

“Come on, I’ll let you hold my hand,” Flynn stuck out her hand to her, wiggling her fingers expectantly. She was wearing those bright yellow gloves, protecting her hands from the scrapes that, since she became a pro, she got less and less. “Swear I won’t let you fall” she added, crossing her heart as if that would put Julie's nerves at ease. Julie let out a breathy laugh through her nose in response, reaching up to grab her friend’s hand nonetheless. 

Upon standing she felt her legs begin to slide from under her, just as they had when she was sitting. “Jesus!” She exclaimed, grabbing Flynn’s shoulder with her free hand, trying her best to steady herself. Flynn put her hand on Julie’s back, giggling slightly, “Trust me! I won’t let you fall, I swear it. Put your helmet on- we’ll practice on the patio until you get the hang of it.” 

Flynn had started by explaining the mechanics of the skates, having Julie clutch the trellis as she skated in place, getting used to the feeling of the wheels rolling under her and only stumbling occasionally. 

“Yes!” Flynn encouraged, clapping her hands sweetly. “Jules, you’re getting it!” Julie had felt an accomplished smile spread on her lips as she began to loosen her grip on the wood. 

“Okay so now you have to break.” Flynn carried on “The break is that thing on the front. It took me ages to get it,” she skated in a small circle, pushing her foot forward slightly, effectively causing the wheels to stop spinning and bringing her to a graceful stop.

“Ta-da!” she exclaimed, triumphantly holding her arms above her head like they do in gymnastics. 

“Impressive,” Julie nodded “Except I’m not doing that” she was sure that the haphazard breaks on the front of her pale blue skates were the _reason_ Flynn sported her brightly colored bandages. 

“Girl! You have to!” Flynn encouraged, skating over to the trellis and breaking effortlessly. “It’s really not that bad once you get it. Do it with me.” She went to the other side of the structure, pointing her toe forward until Julie followed suit. 

They skating slowly, the trellis supporting them as they skating in place and practiced their breaks. Eventually, Flynn stuck her hand out, shooting Julie a supportive smile. “Let’s go in a circle around the patio. Promise I won’t let you fall,” Julie took Flynn’s outstretched hand, slipping only slightly as her pink wheels lurched her forward. 

After a few slow steps forward Flynn looked at Julie, her eyebrows raised. “See? You’re already a natural; I would’ve probably fallen by now. I told you there was nothing to worry about,” 

Eventually, Julie’s grip on Flynn’s hand loosened and she took her first steps, unaided. She tossed Flynn an empowered smile as her friend threw her an encouraging whoop back. She completed a few circles, skillfully avoiding having to break, instead she would grab the nearest surface to slow her down. Flynn watched her slowly speed up, observing as Julie’s confidence in herself began to grow. 

The rest of the world seemed to fade around Julie, her focus zoning in on the pink of her laces and the narrow trek ahead of her. She put extra care into making sure she turned her foot, successfully completing another circle. Forgetting she was currently coasting on wheels, she allowed herself to relax, only focusing on the temperate breeze and the sound of Flynn chanting an encouraging cheer. 

“Julie!” her mother’s voice had broken her out of her thoughts. She turned around just as Flynn shouted a warning, a futile attempt at reminding her that there was a tree she needed to navigate around. 

“Break Jules!” Filled her ears at the same time her mother asked if Flynn was staying for dinner. 

“Shoot!” She yelled, tripping over her break and landing painfully on her knee. “Shhhhhh—,” she hissed, cutting herself off as she remembered her mother was within earshot. “-oot” she finished unceremoniously. She and her mother both hated swearing, but that _really_ hurt. Plus, her father promised her that once she turned 16 she could say “hell”.

“Jules! Oh crap, are you okay?” Flynn skated to her side, dropping down on her knees by her friend. Julie groaned dramatically, rolling over onto her back and covering her eyes. “Am I bleeding? Oh, God,” she muttered. “Am I dying?”

Flynn snorted out a laugh “No, you’re not _dying_ , you drama queen. It’s not bad, just a few scrapes. Hang on,” Flynn skated back to the garage, and returned swiftly with her backpack. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up,” she dusted off a thin coat of the dirt that had smeared Julie's tie-dye shirt. 

Flynn wasted no time in pressing wads of tissue soaked with hand sanitizer to Julies scraped knees and hands. Julie winced at the unpleasant burning that the alcohol caused but she sat still as Flynn stuck a Hello Kitty bandaid to her knee and another to her palm. She pressed a kiss over the band-aid and smirked. 

“See? All better,” 

Julie rolled her eyes, her cheeks flushing slightly. Her palm began to sweat, they felt prickly- sparkly- exactly where Flynns lips had been. It was probably residual pain from the sanitizer. She shook her head and dusted herself off. “Come on, let’s race around the block!” She quickly stood up, Flynn’s arm flying out to steady her but Julie slid forward confidently with a laugh. 

“Careful Jules! Crap,” she heard the sound of Flynn’s skates getting closer behind her. “Oh, it’s on!”


	2. Romantic Dreams Must Stop

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next time Flynn kissed her, it was not on her hand, it was far less platonic and it left her far more confused.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Willkomenn back, reader! Thanks for stopping by!! Hope you enjoy!! <3

The next time Flynn kissed her, it was not on her hand, it was far less platonic and it left her far more confused. 

They were at school, only one period left, and neither one of them felt like attending their last period study hall. Tony, a sophomore, had approached them, handing Flynn the book she left behind in her previous class. English was Flynn’s subject, hence why she was in class with Tony and a bunch of other cute sophomores; Julie was absolutely, 100% _not_ jealous. Flynn had told her that she and Tony sat next to each other in class and yesterday, he had asked for her help writing their midterm essays. Watching as Flynn grabbed her book from his grasp, Julie could see the way she hid a shy smile and how her voice went up a few octaves when she spoke to him. Yeah, she totally liked him… the way he smiled down at her... he absolutely liked her too. 

“Dude, he’s so into you!” Julie exclaimed once Tony was out of earshot. 

“Shut up!” Flynn ducked her head, angling it against her locker; Julie imagined she was blushing. Flynn was usually so confident, it was fun to see her flustered over a crush. 

“Are you kidding? He practically _asked you out!_ ” She shut her locker, turning completely to look at Flynn

“He _did not,_ ” Flynn protested 

“He _did too,_ ” Julie argued back, a smirk spreading on her lips. 

Flynn clutched her books tighter, finally meeting Julies teasing face with an eye roll. “Whatever,” she concluded 

“He’s totally going to ask you to Homecoming,” Julie continued with a smile. 

“Oh my god, he will not. Stoppp!” She whined, stomping her pink combat boot petulantly. 

“He will,” Julie nodded knowingly, beginning to walk in the direction of the study room, “He absolutely will. I bet you an ice cream he will. He ‘wants your help with the midterm essay’” She smirked 

Flynn sighed, walking to catch up to her “That's because I’m _literally_ the only person in the entire class who bothered to read the book.” 

“Uh-huh,” Julie exclaimed, ignoring her best friend's complaints. She was right. 

Of course she was right. That’s why she was sitting in the park, her back propped against a tree with a chocolate ice cream in her hand. Flynn’s head rested in her lap, her own pistachio ice cream abandoned next to her, melting slowly. 

Tony had asked her to homecoming earlier that day and after school, Flynn had begrudgingly bought her ice cream.

It was pretty cute; he had walked up to her with a dumb sign with some stupid pun hidden in a quote from whatever book they were reading in English class, asking Flynn to the dance. He handed her a sunflower and she took it, agreeing to go to homecoming with a flattered smile on her face. She had laughed as he pulled her in for a hug. 

Julie was happy for her. 

So happy for her. 

Flynn deserved this, plus Julie got ice cream out of it. 

She felt her cheeks grow tired as her smile became mechanical and her laughter became distant. Why did it feel like her chest was tightening? Was she feeling jealous? No. She didn’t even like Tony. He was cute- with his dimples and curly hair- but, she wasn’t interested. There was no reason to be jealous. 

Maybe she felt… sad? It wasn’t quite sadness, but maybe it was some sort of longing. Maybe she wasn’t jealous because she wanted Tony- maybe she wanted someone _like_ Tony to ask her to the dance. She wanted a cute guy to ask her to the dance. Yeah, that had to be it. 

_You are happy for her._ She yelled at herself. _She is your best friend and you are happy for her. Whatever you’re feeling, suck it up and smile!_

“You owe me an ice cream,” was the first thing she reminded Flynn, forcing herself to heed her inner voice and not to sound bitter. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Flynn had remarked, folding up the poster Tony made for her and sliding it into her bag.

Flynn has seemed happy when he’d asked her; now, in the park, she seemed distant. 

“Hey,” Julie called softly, petting Flynn’s hair. “Whatcha thinking about?” She licked at her ice cream, effectively preventing the milky chocolate from dripping down her fingers.

“Huh?” Flynn seemed to snap out of her thoughts, “Nothing,” she sat up quickly and joined Julie, pressing her back against the sturdy tree trunk. She took her spoon, dipping it into her pistachio ice cream and placing it into her mouth absentmindedly. Julie watched as she poked at the melted green goop sitting in the cup. 

“I don’t know how you eat that stuff,” Julie joked, trying to get her friend to smile. It worked- to some extent. 

Flynn snorted, “You have no taste,” she stuck her tongue out. 

Julie stared at Flynn who was now very preoccupied with tying together little pieces of grass into knots. She and Flynn could sit for hours, not saying a word, just enjoying each other’s company. Why did Julie feel a need to fill the silence that has blanketed them all afternoon? Why did it feel awkward?

Tony asked Flynn to the dance. Flynn was happy. Julie was happy. Everyone was happy. Why didn’t it feel like it? 

“Hey,” she tried again. Flynn looked up, staring at her intensely. Her gaze took Julie aback; she’s never seen her look like this. Instead of pressing Flynn for an answer, she stared back, searching the other girl's face, mapping every line of worry until she found her destination, what she was looking for. 

“I’ve never kissed anybody,” Flynn said after a bit. 

Julie opened her mouth, and then closed it, leaning her head against the tree and taking another lick of ice cream. “I know, silly.” She decided to diffuse the intensity “You would’ve told me. Besides neither have I,” she shrugged trying her best to remain nonchalant. 

“I bet Tony’s kissed tons of girls,” Flynn muttered self-deprecatingly. Julie hated that; how this one stupid guy had made Flynn doubt herself- or think whatever negative thoughts she was thinking. 

“You don’t know that,” 

“Julie, he’s a _sophomore_ Flynn said dumbly, as if their age difference of a year was a giant deal. 

“Flynn, he’s a _sophomore_ ” Julie shot back, “he’s literally not even a full year older than you,” she rationalized gently “He’s probably having the same conversation with his friends right now,” 

“Oh, he’s definitely not,” Flynn scoffed “literally, do you know all the girls that wanted him to ask them to homecoming? Oh my god, I’m gonna embarrass myself so _bad_ ” 

“Oh, shut up! You’re so cute! Where’s my confident best friend? Come on, Flynn Rider! He asked you because you’re super cool, and pretty and funny. You can bite when you want to, but you’re the sweetest girl I know,”

Flynn gave Julie a side eye “Alright, I’m pretty sure that’s the name of a Disney prince,” Julie snorted and Flynn soon joined in with her own burst of giggles. 

When they settled down, Flynn looked at Julie, any spell of awkwardness broken. “But thanks, Jules. I love you, you know,” 

“Love you to,” Julie smiled at her, warmth filling her chest as she rested her head on Flynn's shoulder. They sat like this for a beat, Julie finishing the rest of her ice cream in a comfortable silence. 

Flynn suddenly spoke. “If I asked, would you kiss me?” 

“What?” Julie shot up, a whiny, breathy nervous laugh escaping her. 

Flynn looked at her alarmed at how quickly her friend had sat up “What?” She questioned back 

“What did you just say?” 

“... I asked if you… would kiss me?” Flynn raised an eyebrow before her eyes widened suddenly. She quickly tacked on “You know! To help me practice for Tony! In case he wants to like, make out or whatever. I don’t know. So I don’t embarrass myself,” she huffed, her cheeks were heating up. “I didn’t mean… sorry that was so weird,” 

Julie nodded quickly, hoping a pink flush wasn’t visible on her cheeks. Why did her stomach feel fluttery? “Oh yeah. Yeah of course. Um.” She swallowed. “Okay.”

Flynn’s head snapped towards hers “Okay? Like, okay, I can kiss you, okay?” 

Julie's voice rose ten octaves. “Um. Yeah. I get it. I mean. You can if you want to” 

“Really?”

Julie shrugged in response “I mean. I haven’t had my first kiss either, so, ” _It would be nice to share it with someone I really cared about,_ she thought. 

Flynn searched her face, pondering her response for only a moment before leaning in and pecking Julie quickly. It was awkward; neither knew what to do with their lips or what actions should follow. Neither one of them had time to react before it ended. 

Julie blinked rapidly, trying to clear the stars blurring her vision. Her head was rushing, and she could feel the warmth of Flynn’s blush radiating off her face like an open fire. 

“That was…” 

“Weird.” Julie cut her off, dragging out the vowel. 

“Really weird,” Flynn nodded in agreement, but never making a move to actually move away from Julie's face. Julie stared back at her, only half surprised when Flynn leaned back in and kissed her again. This time, it was still clumsy and tentative, but she seemed more sure of what she was looking for. 

Julie on the other hand was still trying to find her footing. She closed her eyes, trying to move her lips along to the rhythm that Flynn had set for them. It was weird; Flynn’s lips were soft and tasted like grape lip gloss. Her mouth held the remaining sweet flavor of her pistachio ice cream. It was an interesting combination, but something about it pulled Julie in. She tilted her head slightly, unintentionally deepening the kiss as Flynn scooted closer, putting a hand in Julie's hair. She felt weird fireworks in her chest, like bursts of confetti or sparks of glitter. She felt warm, and not from embarrassment; she never wanted this to end. 

So maybe in that moment, Julie Molina realized that she liked kissing girls. She wanted to keep kissing girls- none of these feelings caused her anxiety. She had seen countless Buzzfeed quizzes as well as learned about it in sex ed. She was probably bisexual. That was fine. More than fine, actually.

It was the fact that she liked kissing Flynn- the fact that she wanted to _keep_ kissing Flynn, that freaked her the hell out. _Did she like her best friend?_ She broke the kiss immediately after the thought popped into her head. Opening her eyes, she let out a shaky exhale, at the same time Flynn let out a small, satisfied laugh.

Julie was at a loss for words, “That was…”

“Better!” Flynn finished “practice makes perfect,”

“Yeah,” Julie agreed in a daze, “yeah, it does” 

“I’m a great kisser,” she pursed her lips jokingly 

Julie raised her eyebrows mockingly “Keep telling yourself that.” She laughed, trying to clear the thoughts in her head “And hey! At least you got your crappy kisses out of the way with me. That way Tony will never know how terrible of a kisser you were!” hoping the joke would break the tension she was probably imagining 

Flynn shoved her, laughing “Thanks Jules,” she smiled genuinely at her. 

Julie was able to give her a genuine smile back, “Of course. Anything for you,” 

She ignored the small pang of longing that had begun to bloom in her chest, putting the thoughts in a box and smashing it.


	3. Faceless Days

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Julie's concerned about her mother. Flynn and Carrie are good friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bienvenue and Happy Holidays, beautiful people who bother reading this story! Thanks for dropping by again! 
> 
> Uhhh I feel like I should put a warning on this chapter because I do allude to cancer and illness if you’re sensitive to that. I drew a lot of Julie's experience with her mom from my own. 
> 
> Anyway! Hope you enjoy it!

Ever since her kiss with Flynn, Julie felt as though her life was increasingly inching downhill. Flynn seemed to be relatively unaffected by their kiss, but Julie couldn't stop thinking about it; turns out, that she could box up her feelings, but she couldn't destroy that box. Julie had a great time at homecoming as the third wheel to her best friend and her boyfriend and she had done her best to curb the burning jealousy she felt when she watched the couple dance. Before Flynn kissed her, she could easily write her feelings off as a fear of losing her best friend, or an unrecognized crush on Tony. Now, she would rather Flynn kiss her again, instead of ever having to watch her kiss Tony again. 

Flynn had been spending a lot of time with him so it had been relatively easy to find excuses to limit their time together. _The less time she spent with Flynn, the less she would want to kiss her._

Because of Flynn's dating Tony, her social circle had seen a mild increase since homecoming. Because Flynn refused to ditch Julie, Julie found herself surrounded by a group of Tony's sophomore friends and another freshman from Flynns English class named Carrie Wilson. Julie knew of Carrie through her father's music and they were in Los Feliz's music program together, but she had never spoken to her; she was rather intimidating. Julie quickly recognized that the two had a lot in common, and when Tony wasn't around Flynn, the three of them could be found listening to music, and jamming outside of school. Making friends with Carrie was probably the most positive thing that had happened to her in the past three months.

Come January, her crush on Flynn had become the least of her problems. Rose had gone to the doctor with stomach pain, which had first, she had written off as the flu or another stomach bug. When her symptoms seemed to persist beyond a week, she had sought out a doctor, however, her doctor had only prescribed her some pills and sent her home. The pills hadn’t changed much, and her mother remained in discomfort so Julie did her best to be helpful: putting the dishes up without being asked, doing everyone’s laundry, and helping cook dinner. She spent less time with Carrie and Flynn, offering to help her mom organize the house and run errands if she needed them. Her mom always brushed her off, insisting she was fine and for the most part continuing with her work. 

Her mother had gone to another doctor because the pain still hadn’t subsided. It had been a month. Some days were worse than others- some days she couldn’t even get out of bed. On those days, Julie would make her mother tea, ensuring she stayed hydrated. She would sit by her bedside, clutching her ukulele as they bounced lyrics back and forth to a foreign melody. 

It was Monday morning, and Julie had spent the entirety of the day before cramming for a test and reading _The Hunger Games_ with her mother. She was emotionally exhausted and she figured she could wake up early and finish the algebra homework she had been avoiding. She reluctantly slid out of bed at 5:30 am and she crept down the stairs, hearing her parent’s hushed voices in the living room, the smell of their coffee faint in the air. She slid past, trying to make it to her backpack, which rested right by the door without them noticing. She wasn't listening to what they were saying, but she could feel the tension floating out of the room, as well as the evident tension in their hushed whisper. She paused she heard her mother say something particularly alarming. 

"It might only be an abscess, Ray!"

_Abscess._

This sentence had caused her mind to imagine went to the worst-case scenario. Julie could really overthink things when she wanted to; rationally, she knew an abscess was an infection- her father had one on his tooth a few years ago and he had a root canal and was fine in a few weeks with antibiotics. An abscess caused a lump and usually, it was because of an infection. The way her mother had phrased her exclamation led Julie to believe that an abscess was the best-case scenario; her mother had been feeling unwell for _months._ Even if it was an infection, it had to be pretty serious if she was in constant pain that no medicine or antibiotic could soothe. Regardless, there was a foreign lump in her body that was causing her pain. In Julie’s brains, lumps were associated with cancer. Cancer was associated with death. She didn’t even want to think about it. 

“Truth is they have no idea what it is until they get an MRI,” her mother’s soft voice continued, sounding broken. 

“An abscess?” Julie had whispered absently, still processing what she was hearing. Her statement caused her parents to turn around quickly, alarm and anxiety were written on their faces. 

“What do you mean, an abscess? What, like an infection? Abscess like a lump? Like...” She forced herself to let the word die on her tongue. 

“No,” her father cut in as Rose shook her head. “Mija, why are you awake?” His face was twisted with concern and her mother just looked tired and sick. 

“I was just…” she knew they weren’t being honest with her. She was not going to allow them to divert the topic. “They found something? I thought you said they didn’t find anything? You told me they didn’t know what was going on... that they didn't find _anything!_ An abscess is definitely something… Mami, what’s going on?” She pressed, feeling her throat beginning to constrict. She studied her parent's faces for answers; her father looking worn down and her mother looking pale and sallow, lacking its usual vibrance. Her expression seemed to mirror the constant pain she was in, though she did her best to hide it. Her eyes were dark and misty and her lips pressed in a tight line. Her father's eyes were fixed in the ground, his hard expression aging him by at least ten years.

“Julie,” her mother began. She watched as her dad squeezed her leg for reassurance. “They really don’t know what it is.” She paused to swallow, the noise sounded painful. “They're going to run some tests, but there’s really no telling what it is until they get an MRI,” Julie felt her eyes begin to burn as her mother carried on with her inspirational spiel. “My love, I promise everything will be alright. I go in on Friday, and they’ll find whatever is wrong and fix it.” 

Julie tuned her out, feeling as though her ears were stuffed with cotton; she slowly backed out of the room, her head nodding against her will, and her palms stung from where her blunt nails were digging into them. 

“I get it." She heard herself say. "I... uh,” she pointed to the staircase and gestured to the bookbag she had grabbed. “Homework,” and she turned on her heel and ran to her room, closing the door so she wouldn't wake her brother. She could practically hear her parents sigh as she let out a whimper, slumping on the floor in an unceremonious heap. She hated this. 

She loved her mother; she was her favorite person in the entire world. She was her best friend, the partner in crime who she always knew had her back, even when she was in the wrong. She made so many people happy, only wanting to hear them laugh or to inspire them with her voice. Her mom only deserved the good things this world had to offer; even if the words she was saying were true, that it was nothing, and only an infection- she didn't deserve to be in this kind of pain. And Julie? Julie by comparison was a terrible person: she was sarcastic, and sometimes she yelled at Carlos when he and his friends were too loud. In fifth grade, she had stolen a tube of her mother's mascara to impress her crush, sometimes she’d lie to her parents about doing her chores, and last week she had gotten detention for passing notes with Carrie during biology. If anyone deserved pain, it was her, not her mother- the kindest and most loving person she had ever met. 

Her head began to throb as the tears wracked her body. She quickly decided that she wasn’t going to school: screw school, screw her homework and screw the whole damn world. Her parents would ultimately be annoyed she decided to skip, but she knew they’d understand; Carlos got to skip two weeks ago just because he was afraid that Rose would be lonely while everyone else was gone. Her awkward position was causing her legs to cramp, but she couldn’t will herself to move as she was lost in her terrible, time-traveling thoughts. Eventually, she dejectedly crawled back into bed, grabbing her phone to send a text to _Triple Threats;_ when she and Flynn jammed together as kids, Flynn had called them Double Trouble, when they jammed with Carrie they were Triple Threats. She texted them she wasn’t feeling good, that she wouldn’t be at school, and not to worry about her. In retrospect, this wasn’t a good idea because it meant that they ended up at her front door after school ended at exactly 4:00 pm. 

Flynn had sent her a text, telling her to come to the door at the same time the doorbell rang. Julie had begrudgingly trudged out of bed and down the stairs. Upon opening the door she was immediately engulfed in a hug by Carrie, who hummed into her hair, “Oh, sweetie? Are you okay? You look like death,”

Her face was buried in Carrie's chest, but she could hear the sound of a smack assuming Flynn had told her to shut up. 

“How’re you feeling Jules?” Flynn took in her puffy eyes and slumped posture when Julie finally broke away from Carrie's embrace, pulling her into another hug. 

“We didn’t know what was wrong, but we brought you soup,” Carrie gestures to her plastic shopping bag. 

“And you’re favorite snacks,” Flynn lifted her own hand to show the bag she was holding. 

“I also brought my speaker! We can rock out, I know that always makes you feel better,” Carrie added. 

Julie smiled lovingly at them. How did she end up with such good friends? Really, it was only a matter of time before she fell in love with one of them. 

“Thanks guys. You really didn’t have to do all of this,” she closed the door once Carrie and Flynn were inside. 

“We know that silly,” Carrie took the lead in climbing the stairs to Julie's room.

“We wanted to! We know you’ve been stressed and busy lately. We were worried about you- we care so much about you,” Flynn said earnestly, reaching for her hand as they ascended the staircase behind Carrie “ _I _care so much about you. I had to make sure my bestie was still hanging on,” Julie squeezed her hand, shutting her bedroom door behind them.__

____

____

“Do you want your soup? I can go get a bowl,” Carrie pulled the container out of the plastic bag as Flynn flopped down on her bed. Julie took the container from Carrie, reaching in the bag to get the spoon that was also from the bag. 

“No need- I’ll just eat it like this,” Julie lifted the top, setting the container on her desk and sitting down in front of it. The scent of the soup wafted through the air; it was pho- a favorite that Carrie and her father swore would fix anything. She smiled to herself “Thanks guys, you really, seriously didn’t need to do this. I’m not even sick. Just a little sad, I guess,” 

Both of her friends looked at her with sympathy in their eyes, waiting in silence for Julie to elaborate.

Finally Flynn spoke: “Do you want to talk about it?” 

Julie let out a sigh, “You know how my mom's been getting those weird, persistent stomach aches?” They nodded in understanding, prompting Julie to continue “She’s been to two doctors and all they do is prescribe medicine that’s not even working. She told me last week that she hasn’t had any blood tests and that her doctors were _sure_ the pain would clear up with meds. I don’t know, it just seems weird to have stomach pains for _two months_ and not run tests or scans or anything.”

“I mean, it may just be chronic stomach pains?” Flynn suggested, unconvinced 

She shrugged letting out a small, bitter laugh “My dad thinks the doctors are racist,” Flynn let out a pathetic laugh through her nose, it sounded more like a sigh “Anyway, this morning I got up at, like, 5 to finish my homework and mom and dad were in the living room…” her eyes filled with tears as she pictured them, her dad's hand resting on her mother’s knee in support as she spoke. “ I heard them talking about an abscess, or a cyst or whatever. At the end of the day, they found a _lump-_ something that shouldn’t be there.” she sighed. "I just don't get why she would keep stuff from me unless something was seriously wrong." 

The room was silent for a beat. 

“Julie, I’m so sorry,” Carrie said from her spot on the colorful ottoman. 

“Yeah, Jules. That- I’m really sorry,” Flynn added, getting off the bed and wrapping Julie into another hug. She smelled like strawberries. 

“Honestly it’s probably nothing- I’m probably imaging the worst-case scenario. It could really just be a cyst, or an infection, or some sort of ulcer. It doesn’t need to be… _that._ I always overthink everything,” she pressed her face into Flynn’s chest, bringing her arms up to return her hug. 

“Still, this sucks. Even if it’s not the worst-case scenario, it sucks seeing your mom like that; I love your mom” Flynn said from above her. Carrie walked over, kneeling by Julie's chair, and reached out, grabbing her hand and giving it a tight squeeze. 

“But, Jules, you’re handling this so well, you’re so strong it’s unbelievable. You’ve been so caring and helpful towards your mom, you’ve been so busy and you’re holding up better than I ever would. You’re doing amazing and I’m proud of you.” Julie felt guilty for the tears that were inevitably soaking Flynn’s top, but she didn’t let go; she just wanted to be held. 

“We’re always gonna be here for you, honey,” Carrie said from her other side. 

“You’re an amazing person, and I love you, _so much_ ” Flynn pulled away to look Julie in the eyes, reaching down to wipe at Julie's tears with her thumb. She leaned forward pressing a kiss to her forehead. Julie felt herself leaning into it, closing her eyes. She was too sad, too wrapped up in thoughts about her mother to be flustered by the fact that Flynn haad kissed her 

“I love you guys,” she said earnestly. 

“Come on. Let’s listen to some music,” Carrie got up and went to connect her phone to her speaker. 

Julie looked at Flynn who gave her a soft smile. _Everything will work out_ she mouthed, before turning around and going to unload the snacks. 

Somehow, she believed her. 

She really did love them.


	4. Still So Far

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flynn breaks up with her boyfriend, and Julie just wants to understand her friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hiii and welcome back! Thanks so much for taking time out of your day and reading! Also, thanks to everyone who commented and left kudos on the previous chapters-- it means a lot. <3 Sending all my love and well wishes to ya'll in the New Year!

Julie had stopped by the store after school to pick up a new heating pad for her mother since Carlos, bless his heart, had burned the last one in the microwave this morning. While she was there she had picked up some aloe juice and pretzels that she decided to take to Flynn; whenever she was sick, Flynn was always there with her favorite things to make her feel better. Flynn's house was a stop in between the store and her own house. She had to drop off a few notes and homework that she missed anyway. She sent the other girl a text, letting her know she had her homework and that she was stopping by. The text went unanswered; Flynn always answered her texts. She hoped Flynn wasn't seriously sick. Maybe she was just sleeping. _She's probably just sleeping,_ Julie rationalized with herself before she sent her mind into overdrive. Regardless, Julie knocked on the front door, and she was greeted by Flynn's mom, who had let her in. She instructed Julie to help herself to whatever was in the kitchen and explained that Flynn was in her room, catching up on today's homework. Julie had thanked her with a smile, descending the stairs towards Flynn's bedroom.

When she opened the door, she found that Flynn was doing no such thing; it seemed she found the ceiling far more interesting than her homework.

“Hey bestie,” Julie started, walking into Flynn's room and dropping her bookbag. Flynn was sprawled out on her bed, her grey hoodie a stark contrast from her usual bright color palette. She was hugging her giant narwhal plushie. “What's up? ” Julie perched on the edge of the bed. "How ya feeling?" she brushed the back of her hand against Flynn's forehead like her mother does for her whenever she's sick. "You don't have a fever... so that's good, I guess." She only received an absent-minded hum from Flynn. She reached into her discarded book back, pulling out the aloe juice, the bag of pretzels, and handing them to the other girl. "Those are for you. Oh! I also have some notes for you! Your mom said you were in here doing homework, which I thought was weird because you didn't have the right notes to complete it, so-"

“I broke up with Tony,” Julie snapped her mouth closed at Flynn's random admission. She slowly set the notes she had taken on the bed, raising her eyebrows and waiting for Flynn to elaborate.

“I broke up with Tony,” she repeated again. Julie eyed Flynn; she didn't look sick, and she didn't look particularly sad either. She _was_ hugging what she called her _Emotional Support Narwhal,_ but she also did that when she was tired. She tried her best to gauge the emotions that her friend was not emitting, finding it frustrating that she couldn't at the moment.

“Mmm-hmmm” Julie prompted softly. She tried to keep the straightest face possible; she didn’t hate Tony, but seeing him with Flynn made something nasty twist in her chest. She had assumed that her crush on Flynn was because, well, she was her best friend- didn't everyone like their best friend at one point? Flynn was one of the only people who fully understood Julie, who fully listened to her without judgment. Sure, it helped that they bonded over music and several shared interests, but Flynn just _got_ her in a way she was sure that no one ever would. She was like her platonic soulmate... until Julie started looking at her in a not-so-platonic way. Also, Flynn was her first kiss. She imagined this crush was only because of proximity; _she was always there_. It's hard to keep your feelings platonic when someone as amazing as Flynn was there. She and Tony could at least agree on one thing. After she had gotten used to the idea of Flynn dating Tony, she convinced herself many of the feelings had dissipated. She had gotten to a point where she could be around Tony without wanting him to fall through the floor, only acknowledging the pang of jealousy when she witnessed them kissing, wishing that it was her instead. She tried to ignore the feeling of hope blooming in her chest, fighting to keep the smile off her face. Flynn was single. _but that's bad_ she re herself but to no avail. 

“Over a text.” Flynn continued, breaking her out of her thoughts. Julie's jaw fell in disbelief “at 3:00 am.” Flynn looked up at Julie, a very serious expression on her face. “The text said ‘bye, bitch,’ and then I blocked him,” 

“What?! It did _not! You did not!_ ” Julie was holding back a laugh behind her hand.

“Okay, I didn't,” Flynn snorted. “But I did break up with him at 3 am. Over a text. Am I a bad person? Carrie says I’m a bad person,” She chose to ignore the fact that this meant that Flynn had spoken to Carrie before she had Julie. She wondered if Flynn would've told her if she hadn't stopped by. She knew she would've found out eventually, but the fact that Flynn had chosen not to tell her, still stung. She covered the wound with a joke: 

“Oh, my god, Flynn of _course_ you’re a bad person,” Julie rolled her eyes, smiling when she saw a small smile paint Flynn’s lips. “You're a little heartbreaker now," Flynn snorted at that. "Are you sad about it?” she added, still having a really hard time grasping how Flynn felt. At the moment, she knew that her friend was quieter than usual, still hugging her narwhal, and actively avoiding telling Julie about the status of her relationship. That didn't necessarily mean she was sad, though; she could be pensive, or tired. Maybe both

“No!” Flynn answered quickly, throwing up her hands in frustration. “No, I’m not sad about it and _thats_ why Carrie says I’m a bad person.” 

“I mean, at least you didn’t say ‘bye, bitch,’” Julie chuckled 

“I should’ve, though,” 

Julie did a double-take, “Should you have, really? I thought you were really into him,” The idea of Tony hurting her best friend suddenly flashed through her mind. Anger quickly filled her as she whispered “Wait, did he do something to you? Did he cheat on you?? I’ll kill him if you want me to” The idea of anyone hurting Flynn was enraging, and she had no qualms cursing Tony out; Flynn was the only reason she had to be cordial to him. Plus, Carlos was constantly telling her that she was _scary_ when she was angry and she fully intended to use that to her advantage if need be.

“Slow your roll, Jules." Flynn laughed, before clearing her throat. "No, he didn’t do anything, he’s actually been really amazing. I literally told him "It's me, not you," I felt like I was in some dumb, Netflix rom-com..." Julie nodded in understanding- her life seemed to have become frighteningly similar to a cliche tv trope too. "I just felt like I was stringing him along and it felt unfair to him, you know?” 

"Yeah," Julie breathed, even though she really had no idea. When it became clear that Flynn was not going to elaborate, Julie prompted “How so?” 

“I mean, literally, my heart wasn’t in it anymore. Honestly, that’s high key unfair to him and I'm just wasting his time. And mine too,” 

_Where was your heart, then?_

“Honestly, Jules? I kinda liked someone else,” Flynn shrugged. 

“I said that aloud?” Julie’s voice rose an octave, much to her chagrin. She felt her cheeks heat up. _Shoot._

“Huh?” Flynn asked 

“Nevermind,” Julie laughed nervously. “Anyway, you, uh… you like someone else?”

“Yeah, kinda,” Flynn admitted, sheepishly. 

Silence. 

Flynn made no move to continue the conversation. Julie determined that she wasn't sad, but she was definitely pensive. And tired. Definitely a mix of both. When Flynn got like this, she'd doodle in the margins of her journal, take a nap and she would bounce back refreshed. Julie concluded that she would have to steer this conversation. “Who is it?” It wasn’t out of character or her to ask. It was out of character for Flynn not to tell her, though. 

Flynn reached over and grabbed the aloe juice, slowly uncapping it and taking a sip. Normally Julie would have made a comment about how nasty the stuff was, and Flynn would have chastised her child-like palet. Flynn cut her off before she could make the joke. “It doesn’t matter. Thanks for this, by the way," she took another long sip, clearly trying to avoid answering. Julie swallowed down the hurt rising in her throat. "Anyway, there’s absolutely no chance they’d like me back, so, it’s really no use dwelling on it. I just… thought it would be awful if I didn’t tell Tony… cause if, hypothetically, he liked someone else while we were dating... I know I’d be really annoyed. So,” She flopped back onto her back, absently twisting the friendship bracelet Julie had made for her. Her eyes, once again, found their way to the ceiling, getting lost in it's boring white. 

“What do you mean, _there’s no chance they’d like you back?_ Come on, Flynn! What’s not to like?” Julie said hoping the compliment might help clear the grey cloud that currently resided over Flynn's bedroom.

“Okay, but you’re my best friend- you _have_ to say stuff like that,” she shook her head, a faint smile on her face. 

“Yeah, I’m your best friend, but I one hundred percent mean it!" she scooted over, closing the gap of space between them. Laying on her back, she looked up at the ceiling, hoping to find the same interest Flynn found in the matte plaster. "Plus, I would never lie to you, _that's_ in the 'best friend' job description. Seriously, though, Flynn; you’re the coolest person I know. Honestly, the smartest, most talented, prettiest girl I’ve ever met. There’s nobody on this earthly plane that deserves your affection.” Julie joked, reaching out and grabbing Flynn's hand. She gave it a reassuring squeeze “Whoever they are, they're lucky that you _The Fantastic Flynn_ , has a crush on them. And if they don’t feel the same?” she smiled, shrugging “Then that’s their loss and they weren’t worth your time in the first place.” 

Flynn bit her lip, tearing her eyes from the ceiling to look at Julie. She looked unconvinced. Julie laughed. “I’m serious! You should tell them; you miss a hundred percent of the shots you don’t take,” She encouraged. She didn’t know what was possessing her to _encourage_ Flynn to pursue another relationship when she knew she would end up jealous and bitter if whoever-they-were got to kiss, and _be with_ her best friend in the way she wanted to be. She was some sort of sick masochist, she surmised. 

Flynn stared at her for a while, a silent conversation going on behind her gaze; Julie could almost hear the gears turning in Flynn’s head as her eyes narrowed and became intense. Julie swallowed, maintaining eye contact with her friend.

“Flynn? Are you- mmmh-,” she was cut off by her best friend's lips on hers. It was familiar, a feeling that Julie had longed to experience again, but this was confusing. She desperately wanted to kiss back, to continue where they had left off so many months earlier, but she was frozen. She was confused. 

In the second she regained the ability to move, she broke the kiss, standing up so quickly her head rushed. Or maybe the kiss caused the headrush. She couldn't tell. Regardless, she needed to leave. 

“I’m sor—,” Flynn started, sitting up just as quickly as Julie had.

“Don’t worry. It’s fine. I’m fine. Everything’s fine. I… I have to get home? My mom wasn’t feeling great, so I need to go… check on her. Um…I’ll see you tomorrow? ” Julie all but stuttered out, bending down and slinging her bag over her shoulder. 

“Jules…” 

“Yeah, I’ll see you tomorrow.” She quickly exited the room, closing the door behind her before her friend could get another word in. She exited Flynn’s house as fast as her legs could carry her. She felt the telltale sign of tears prick the back of her eyes as her cheeks rose to unnatural temperatures. She let out a grateful sigh, remembering that today was Friday. She told Flynn she'd see her tomorrow; _Tommorrow was Saturday and after that, Sunday._ She had all weekend to mull over this, to process it, and then to completely forget that it ever happened. Yeah, that's what she would do. Everything would go back to normal. Flynn would end up with whoever her crush was, and Julie would forget hers eventually.

She was content with the resolutions she had made within herself, but she was still plagued with confusion and questions: _Why would Flynn do that? Did she know Julie liked her? Was she mocking her? Was she trying to make a point? … Did Flynn like her? Was she the person Flynn liked???_

The last question made Julie scoff with bitterness- _, of course, Flynn didn’t like her_

There’s no chance she liked her back, _so there was no point dwelling on it_


	5. Story Book Endings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After talking to Carrie, Julie confesses to Flynn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome back!
> 
> If you've made it this far *hugs* 
> 
> I've been intimidated as hell to write for this fandom, so thank you for the sweet comments and kudos! 
> 
> I hope you enjoy the final chapter! <3

So, Julie was kind of freaking out. 

That was gross understatement. She was _really_ freaking out. 

Flynn had kissed her. You kiss people you like and Flynn _did not like her._ Even if she did, best friends dating each other was a disastrous trope and it also _never happened in real life._ Flynn liked Tony: she went on about him, she was excited about their dates, she giggled at everything he said. 

And then she broke up with him. 

Why did she break up with him??

And _she kissed Julie._

_Why did she kiss her?_

She was undoubtedly sad about her relationship with Tony; she did miss him- she had to miss him. Even if she initiated the breakup, there has to be some sort of grieving, right? Flynn hadn’t come to school, she was wearing what she called her ‘Sad Sweatshirt’ and she was hugging her freaking _emotional support narwhal; why would she need any kind of emotional support if she wasn’t hurting in some capacity?? _She was also grappling with the unrequited crush she mentioned had caused the breakup in the first place, and Julie knew how that felt. That disappointment, combined with missing her ex-boyfriend, had compelled her to kiss Julie.__

____

__Okay, so that didn’t make much sense- there was no way that those things measured up, but Julie was trying her best to rationalize it._ _

____

She had done her best to conceal her feelings for her best friends, and as far as she knew, she had, been inconspicuous about them and no one else knew: not her parents, her brother, Carrie, and especially not Flynn. She had no intentions to let Flynn know that she had feelings for her, and she certainly was not going to let it ruin their friendship. 

The same barrage of thoughts and questions ran through her head all weekend. She was grateful for the weekend, using it as an excuse to get ahead in homework and help around the house, making sure her mother was comfortable and helping Carlos with his homework. 

She had a few missed calls from Flynn on Friday, which she dutifully ignored, as well as a text from Carrie requesting that she call her. She had shut her phone off after telling Carrie she couldn’t talk that day or, conveniently, for the rest of the weekend. 

She had spent all of Sunday morning sulking in her room. She had finished her homework, but she had taken it upon herself to rewrite and color-code all her notes; she was doing this for the sole purpose of avoiding her friends.

“Julie! You have a phone call!” her dad's voice called, it sounded muffled through her door. 

She suppressed a groan; one thing Julie hated, was the remaining installation of her landline telephone. Everybody in her house had a cell phone, and none of her friends had landlines in their homes anymore. Nobody used them. It was probably Flynn or Carrie; if they couldn’t reach Julie, they’d call her _house_ and her parents would undoubtedly summon her from her room and she’d be roped into a conversation that she _didn’t_ want to have.

She grumbled as she rolled off her bed. “Who is it?” She began her descent down the stairs. 

_It’s Carrie or Flynn, Carrie or Flynn, Carrie or Flynn._

It was probably Carrie. 

“It’s Carrie,” he confirmed; she contemplated heading back to her room. “Can you tell her I’m busy?” she _really_ wanted to go back to her room. She paused on the stairs, listening as her father spoke into the receiver, stating that Julie was busy. “Hold on one second,” she heard him say. He appeared in the doorway, eyebrows raised. “She says it’s important.” Julie tried to suppress an eye roll; The Queen of Meddling. Whatever Carrie needed to tell her, probably could wait until Monday, when Julie had finished marinating in her self-pity. She reluctantly walked down the stairs, grabbed the phone, and grumbled the most ungrateful sounding ‘thank you’. 

“Hello?” she huffed into the receiver.

“Julie!” Carrie’s shrill voice rang through the phone. She sounded far too energetic for 11 am on a Sunday morning. 

“Hey, Carrie.” she sighed, “Listen, I was really busy with homework. I’ve been swamped all weekend and I really need to get back to it.” 

“You sound so happy to hear from me.” she laughed, “Don’t worry, I love you too,” her humorous statement was met with silence on Julies end. “Anyway,” Carrie finally continued absently “I was talking to Flynn yesterday…” See? The Queen of Meddling, Carrie Wilson. 

“Of course you were,” the mention of her friend's name caused her heart rate to pick up; she hated the fact that Flynn and Carrie had talked. She hated the fact that it was _probably_ about her. 

Carrie decided to ignore her comment and carried on with “Well, we were both worried about you. Flynn said she’s tried to reach you a few times on Friday and I’ve sent you like a thousand texts.” she paused. When Julie offered no explanation, she continued speaking, “I know you’ve been stressed with stuff about your mom- how is she by the way?” 

“She's… she’s okay. She’s still in bed, but she’s doing alright.” she awkwardly responded. 

“Good,” Carrie replied earnestly. She paused again, seemingly unsure what else to say, which was strange for someone as forward as Carrie. “Um, anyway! We know you’ve been stressed with stuff about your mom and school and all of it, basically. Since you didn’t call anyone back, I wanted to make sure you were okay. Are you okay?”

“Yeah, I’m okay Carrie,” she sucked in a breath. “Thanks for… checking in? I have a lot of homework to do… so-”

“Flynn told me what happened on Friday,” Carrie interjected quickly. Julie already knew that, but hearing it startled her; she knew this was the reason that Carrie had called. She was either filling herself in on the gossip or was genuinely concerned for the relationship of her friends. Julie determined that it was probably a healthy combination of both. She pressed her lips into a hard line. “She said you left really quickly and then you ghosted her all weekend.”

Julie wasn’t sure how to respond to that. Regardless of what Flynn’s intentions were with the kiss, Julie _had_ run off, refused to listen to her _and_ ignore her for two days. “Is she okay?” Suddenly, he felt like a bad friend. 

“I mean, she’s fine. I guess she’s a little upset, but not at you, so don’t worry about that. She’s mostly worried, I think.” 

Julie swallowed. “I—“

“Like, I have no idea what you’re going through. I know it’s a lot; I won’t even pretend I get it, because I don’t. But, Flynn? She really cares about you, Julie. And you know, even if you, like, don’t feel the same… you need to tell her that. And she’ll understand because honestly, babe? She’s just really worried that she ruined her relationship with her best friend.”

“I mean… I’m not sure there’s anything Flynn could do to ruin our friendship,” _I care about her too much._ Julie let out a nervous laugh. She had a hard time holding a grudge against Flynn for anything; even if Flynn _did_ kiss her because she was confused, or missed Tony- that was fine- she understood. She got it. She would get over it. Julie would do anything to make sure the other girl remained in her life, including ignoring her increasingly painful feelings for her. “She could probably kill someone and I’d be right there, helping her hide the body,” she joked, hoping to ease the building tension in her chest.

“I really think you should talk to her,” Carrie said. 

“I mean, of course, I’m gonna talk to her. I’ll see her on Monday! I’m not—,"

“No, I mean to tell her how you feel, silly,” Carrie cut her off with a snort.

The statement stunned Julie into silence. How could Carrie possibly know _anything_ about how she felt? She barely knew herself. She had done everything she could to maintain normalcy within her relationship with Flynn, she didn’t understand how anyone could pick up on anything when she had made sure that nothing would change. 

“Um.” She struggled to find the right words “And… How exactly do I feel?” She questioned, uneasily toying at the ends of a curl that had escaped her bun. 

She could almost imagine Carrie's pointed expression, rolling her eyes, and completely unamused. “I don’t know, Julie, you tell me,” she said, her voice taking on a tone she usually lectures in, “Or don’t tell me, I don’t care,” she added quickly when she realized that Julie probably _would not tell her._ “I just know that you look at Flynn like she’s hung the stars and moon. Everything she says is the funniest thing in the entire world to you, you’d give an arm and a leg for her. I swear to god, Tony could’ve spontaneously combusted with the way you glared at him. And yeah, you would totally help her cover up a crime scene."

“I’d help you cover a crime scene too! That’s normal best friend stuff! And I did _not_ glare at Tony!” Julie objected “I liked him just fine, and if Flynn’s happy, then I’m happy,” 

“I also know that you’d completely melt if she kissed you again."

“Okay, I’m hanging up,” Julie warned, with no real threat behind it. She didn’t understand what her friend was trying to do, and how she’d picked up on the feelings she thought she’d concealed so well. 

“Okay, fine, you have homework, you don’t like her like that, blah blah blah. I get it. I’ll let you go.” <

“Carrie, I don’t…” she huffed as she searched for a response, “Look. I’ll call Flynn tonight, I promise. I feel bad about what happened and I need to talk to her anyway,” 

“I’ll kill you both if things are awkward on Monday!” Carrie said, sugar dripping in her voice.

“I know you will,” Julie cracked a small smile, matching Carrie’s tone. 

“For the record, she’d definitely melt if you kissed her back,” the smirk on her face was evident and Julie could practically hear the cackle that was yet to come. 

“Oh, my god. I _hate_ you,” she was happy the other girl wasn’t with her to witness the insane rogue that currently colored her face; she would never be able to live it down.

She mostly hated the fact that Carrie was right; she would absolutely melt if Flynn kissed her again. She wasn’t fully convinced that Flynn would do the same, but Carrie seeming to think so was mildly reassuring. Julie knew that Flynn had been talking to Carrie; Flynn had told Carrie about her breakup with Tony before she had told Julie. She desperately wanted to know the conversations they’d had. 

“I swear, I’m not setting you up for failure; you’re both just hopeless,” Carrie scoffed. “If I’m completely wrong, you can... I don’t know… throw my phone in the sink,” Julie figured Carrie putting the life of her cellphone on the line was equivalent to a normal person swearing on someone’s grave. 

“Okay, maybe… I kinda would… melt if she kissed me again,” saying it aloud felt foreign, and it was more for herself than anything. Carrie's light laugh reminded her that she was still on the line

“I know, silly. You’re both being silly, trust me.” She sighed. “In all seriousness, Jules. I’m here for you guys, I don’t want my two besties to fight, especially over something that can be solved easily. So call Flynn!”

“I promise I will. I’ll—,”

“If you don’t, I will _absolutely_ know- because she will tell me- and I will kill you both! Which would really suck, because there would be no one left to help me hide the bodies,” <

“You’re not funny.” Julie laughed dryly. “And I promise, I’ll call her when I finish my homework- which won’t be anytime soon if keep yelling at me!”

“Well, I certainly don’t want to be the reason your head stays in your ass,” This time her threat had been enough for Carrie to abruptly end the call. “Okay! Love you, byeee,”

She huffed out a sigh, her fingers hovering over the keypad of the handset phone. What was the worst thing that could happen if she confessed to Flynn? She knew that there was very little she and Flynn disagreed on, nothing that was large enough to completely destroy her friendship. Flynn might make fun of her for a few days, as she always does when Julie has a crush, but she wouldn’t _hate_ her for her silly little crush, right? Flynn is the one who kissed her in the first place; even if she was confused, or lonely, Julie knew she wouldn’t hate her.

She found herself impulsively typing Flynn’s cell number into the keypad, the shrill ring of the phone making her realize what she’d done. Despite this, she couldn’t bring herself to hang up. There were a few rings. And another ring. And another ring. It kept ringing until it was clear, Flynn wasn’t going to pick up 

_Hey! It’s Flynn!_ Her colorful voice was enough to bring a small smile to Julie's face. _I can’t get to the phone at the moment, but if you leave me your name and number, I’ll call you back as soon as I can!_ Julie quickly hung up before the beep could sound.

Instead, she was skipping stairs to her room and sliding on a pair of her nearest gym shoes. She grabbed her phone, catching a glimpse of herself in the full-length mirror. She quickly undid her bun, frantically running her fingers through her hair in attempts to make it look like she _hadn’t_ been moping in her room all weekend. She kind of wanted to switch out her oversized hoodie for something more flattering, maybe a skirt or…? Maybe she should take another shower? Make-up?

She shook her head, resting her glasses on her nightstand and forcing herself out of her room, down the stairs, and out her front door. 

If she took a shower, she’d end up staying there for at least two hours, the result being her sitting and crying under the hot water. If she changed her outfit, she knew she’d end up unsatisfied with whatever she decided to put on, changing it a million times until she had exhausted all of her energy and decided to go to bed. By then, she would lose whatever otherworldly force was currently compelling her to talk to Flynn and once that was gone, she knew she would never tell the other girl. Or ever speak to anybody again. Then Carrie would have no choice _but_ to kill her. Which, now that she thought about it, didn’t sound that bad after all.

 _Okay, Julie. You got this. You got this, you got this! You’re going to go to Flynn’s house, you’re going to knock on the door, you’re going to ask her why she kissed you and then apologize for freaking out and running away. If she says she somehow, miraculously_ likes _you, then you will ask to kiss her. And possibly to make next Friday movie night, a date._

It was a plan, an assignment she’d given herself- an assignment with a deadline in a few minutes. 

She plucked a tulip from the flower bed up front- flowers were romantic, right? And even if they weren’t, Flynn liked purple tulips so it could serve as a peace offering if all else failed. _Sorry for running off and then ignoring you, even though you’re definitely hurting over your break-up and I almost definitely made it worse._

It was almost afternoon and the sun was shining in full brightness; Julie felt like the growing heat was taunting her, forcing her to walk quickly towards her best friend’s house. The breeze was light, but also calming, snapping her into the present as the sun smirked at her. She realized she had been squeezing the tulip, causing a few petals to fall off. 

The walk to Flynn’s was not nearly enough time to pull her thoughts and courage together. In fact, in the short amount of time, she had felt all motivation drain out of her body. Standing face to face with the brass street address of the house that was a second home to her, was suddenly so intimidating and rather repelling. She stood there, fist raised and ready to connect it with the white wooden door she’d knocked on so many times. 

_Deep breaths._

She wasn’t sure how long she was standing there, her eyes closed, and her forehead an inch from hitting the door in defeat, but it felt like centuries. She could practically feel the eyes of Flynn’s crazy neighbor eyeing her from across the street with her expensive binoculars. 

“Julie?” She felt everything in her body freeze, her jaw clenching. 

“Flynn!” She said through her teeth, turning around mechanically. Her best friend was walking up the pathway to her front door. She was smiling, but her eyebrows were raised, a quizzical expression on her face. She was dressed in her usual bright palette, her hair swept in a high ponytail and light makeup highlighted her features. It was a stark contrast from the last time Julie had seen her. Her mouth ran dry.

“Uh… you look nice…” she complimented as Flynn pulled out her house keys, unlocking the door. 

“Yeah?” She laughed, “Thanks. Went for breakfast with Carrie- we missed you! We tried calling you earlier, but you didn’t pick up.” she shrugged, walking inside of her house, “Are you coming inside, or what, loser?” Julie was still standing outside, almost in the same position she had been before Flynn had come. Flynn was acting as if nothing had changed; there was no hesitation, no anxiety- as if she hadn’t been losing her mind the entire weekend like Julie had been. 

She scurried inside, “Yeah. Sorry about that?” Flynn was staring at her with an expectant look on her face. Julie wasn’t sure what else she should say. “We should talk.” She took a breath, “Can we talk in your room?” 

Flynn nodded wordlessly, turning around and leading them to her room downstairs. Julie stood awkwardly as the other girl dropped her bag and pulled off her platform boots. She never realized how much she relied on Flynn to lead their serious conversations. Flynn was the perfect mediator in a lot of situations; she knew how to conduct a healthy, productive conversation that almost always ended with a resolution, no matter who she was speaking to. It was evident though, that Flynn had been trying to speak to her all weekend and trying to reach out to make sense of things. Julie had turned her phone off, effectively shutting everybody out and she still hadn’t turned it back on. She had to speak first. 

Carrie’s words were playing like a broken record in the back of her mind.

“Okay. So on Friday, at 3 am, you broke up with Tony.” Julie started, “And you didn’t tell me, which is fine, I guess. It just makes things more confusing.” She remembered she had the tulip behind her back, squeezing the life out of it, “Uh. Anyway. You broke up with Tony and twelve hours later… you kissed me.” Flynn nodded slowly, her facade of nonchalance seeming to crack. 

“I did kiss you.” She confirmed, “And you ran away!” her smile was painfully manufactured. Normally, it would have caused Julie to laugh, instead, she winced before continuing. 

“I’m really sorry for ignoring you. And I’m sorry for running away. You’re my favorite person in the entire world- you get me in ways that nobody else does; I think we’re connected on a whole other astral plane,” she joked, drawing a small laugh from Flynn. “I talked to Carrie this morning- probably right after you guys were out-and she told me to tell you how I felt… and I think I’ve always felt like this, but I didn’t recognize it until you started talking to Tony. I chalked it up to me being afraid I would lose my best friend to some stupid guy- or maybe that I was jealous you got a boyfriend before I did… until you kissed me in the park that day- do you remember that? It was when I realized, ‘wow women are cool.’” 

This was so awkward, why was this so awkward? Why was _she_ so awkward? 

“Yeah, women _are_ cool.” Flynn agreed, nodding. 

“I really don’t want this to change anything between us, Flynn. I just. I want to be your friend more than anything. And maybe we destroyed a major boundary when we kissed because I haven’t- since that day in the park all I’ve wanted to do was kiss you again- and I’ve probably been a bit of a jerk to Tony- because, god, I wanted to dance with you at homecoming, and every time he held your hand or kissed you, I wanted it to be _me_ ; I knew it would never happen because dating your best friend? It doesn’t happen.” 

_What you’re not gonna do, Julie Molina, is cry,_ she instructed herself, _woman up_

She swallowed the tears that had begun to form behind her eyes and forced herself to continue.“And then you kissed me, Flynn! I had been wanting that to happen for so long. But you broke up with Tony because you liked someone else, _and then you kissed me? Me!_ What was I supposed to do?” The volume of her voice was rising without her consent as she began to ramble. “How am I supposed to feel? You _keep_ kissing me and then running off with somebody else! You kiss me- my first kiss- and then go out with Tony. I just want you to be happy, so _of course,_ I was gonna suck it up and help you get with whoever-they-are. And then you kiss me again! It’s confusing, and I can’t pretend it doesn’t hurt.” she realized that she hadn’t taken a breath in a while. 

Flynn was staring at her, her expression unreadable. “And I’ll forget it! I’ll get over it- I promise. I’ll help you get with them. I swear. I’ve felt this way for so long Flynn, it doesn’t change anything. Nothing has to change!” She _had_ felt this way for so long; she recalled when she’d fallen on her roller skates, how her heart had skipped when Flynn had attempted to kiss her wound better. 

“Jules, are you serious?” Flynn blinked. 

Then, she was throwing her head back in laughter as Julie’s jaw proceeded to drop. She felt her eyes burn, “Yes, Flynn! I’m serious! Why are you laughing? This is—,”

“You! You, you absolute _dummy!_ ” Flynn was still laughing. “Girl, _please stop crying! I will cry,_ if you start crying.” Julie inhales wetly, her muscles locked in place. 

“Julie. I broke up with Tony because I. Like. _You._ ” She punctuated each word with a clap. “I thought you left because you were grossed out, or something,” Flynn admitted.

“I…” Julie’s lips moved but nothing came out.

“I dated Tony because, yeah, he’s really sweet, he asked me out and I thought ‘hey, maybe this will help me get over my crush on my best friend, _the prettiest girl in the world,_ Julie Molina,’”

“Oh my god, stop. That’s _you_ ” Julie's voice broke as she attempted to laugh; it sounded more like a cough as she wiped her eyes with the sleeve of her hoodie. 

“We’re not going to fight about this: I’m always right, so I’ll win,” Flynn stood up, walking over to meet where Julie stood. 

“This is for you,” Julie held the semi-crushed tulip out to her. She cleared her throat, lamely adding, “It’s a ‘will-you-go-on-a-date-with-me-next-Friday’ tulip, but I was prepared for it to be an ‘I’m-sorry-I-completely-ruined-our-friendship-please-forgive-me’ tulip if things went south…” 

Flynn took the flower, twirling its slightly bent stem between her fingers “I can’t believe you didn’t get that I was talking about you,” she shook her head jokingly “That's like… _teenage boy_ level dense.” Nonetheless, she pulled Julie into a hug. 

“Carrie was right… we were being silly,” Julie said eventually, her voice was muffled as she buried her face in Flynn’s shoulder. 

Flynn pulled away, her nose wrinkled. “Absolutely not, I made every single move- _you_ were being silly,” 

“You dated someone else for an _entire month… because you liked me?_ Make it make sense, Flynn!” she smacked her shoulder playfully, a smile reaching her eyes as she felt any tension from before leaving her body.

“Okay, yeah, yeah. In hindsight, that was pretty dumb,” Flynn conceded. Her voice softened as she continued, “But yes. I accept your ‘go on a date with me on Friday' tulip,”

“Really?” Julie half-whispered. 

“Yes, really!” Flynn whispered back, resting her forehead against her best friends. “Of course, I will,”

 _Oh my god, what do I do now?_ She internally screamed at herself. _Do I kiss her? Can I do that? I really want to kiss her._ Her internal questions weren’t riddled with anxiety, instead, they were filled with giddy and expectant energy. 

Flynn’s lips quickly connected with hers. It was nothing more than a peck, quick and chaste, lasting only a split second. “Wanted to make sure you didn't run away again,” she joked lightly as Julie scoffed. The comment caused a surge of confidence to jolt through her as she recaptured Flynn’s lips. She could only hear her heartbeat drum in her ears as she focused on the softness of Flynn’s lips, the warmth of her breath, and the gentleness of her touch. Julie parted her lips, deepening the kiss, and relishing in the feeling of the fireworks, the confetti, and bits of glitter that overwhelmed her senses. The kiss was slow, and when she pulled away, Julie was left breathless with phantom sparkles dancing where the other girl’s lips had been. 

Flynn was staring at her intently, a playful smile dimpling her face. “That was…” 

“Amazing. Perfect. Magical. _Enchanting,_ ” Julie supplied. 

“All of the above,” Flynn leaned back in. 

She felt fireworks. Glitter. Confetti. Sparkles. Essentially, she felt the most cliche words to match the most cliche relationship that she had previously believed could never come true. 

She had been proved wrong about _a lot_ today, she supposed. 

It was amazing. Perfect. Magical. _Enchanting._


End file.
